Saturday, February 21, 2015

About Nothing, Elemental Absurdity, Is Everybody In?

Working for the weekend.
Been a couple of weeks since I have written on here. I may start making this more of a bi-weekly thing instead of weekly. I have so little going on that sometimes I feel like I am clawing at whiny self indulgent straws every week. Also one of my New Years resolutions was to complain less and I think every other week would be a more reasonable amount of complaining. And absolutely nothing interesting ever happens in my life so it makes it difficult to expound upon cipher. I often times work all day and then come home and read about all the cool things that other people are doing. This year has got to be my year to get shit done. I think I was premature when I thought last year was the year. But I think that now the stars are aligning and I just might be able to pull something off for myself. Or maybe I will just sit around Michigan forever until the end of time. Could go either way.

This will help explain the next bit.

That's an ethos I can get behind.
I am just sick of being tired all the time. I just drink coffee, listen to Nirvana, (happy belated birthday Kurt,) and read about famous demons. Well I don't know if they are famous; can something spurious ever truly be famous? Then again Batman is fabricated and he is pretty famous. I know I lament religion a lot but I want it to be known that I piss on everything. I don't just shit on angels and apostles, I also scorn demons and acolytes. Though I will be honest I do think demons are cooler I think it's all laughable. As Slayer says, "I hate everyone equally, I don't need no segregation, no separation just me and my world of enemies." I like that, it's simple and direct. I got on this thought because the other day we listened to some 2000's era alternative rock bands and the song "Voodoo" by Godsmack came on. I'll admit at the time, it was probably the 5th bassline I ever learned. But I remember kids at my school saying, "You know the singer of Godsmack? Well he's into Wicca and in that music video that's his coven performing a ceremony!" And they were real creeped out about it. And at the time I was a total nu metal fiend (still am) and not wanting to feel left out I played along. But even then in the back of my mind I was thinking, "Wicca huh...that sounds fucking dumb." I had an ex who hated Christians at least half as much as I do but eventually they revealed that they too believed in many pagan theologies including Wicca. I give pagans a little bit more slack since they were here first but eventually you would think that reason would prevail. It doesn't take much investigating to realize that all of this was shit that someone made up a long time ago for whatever the reason, most likely to fuck someone over. And the only reason people accept these answers is because the unknown is terrifying to them. Personally, I just don't lose sleep over not knowing the next step. I don't emit fleeting piety like a religious leech, but at the same time I am not naive to the point that I think I have everything figured out and my body will just rot in the ground and that's it. We will never understand the "beyond" and I have accepted it. And no amount of holy water, séance's or tree orgies are going to make a difference. All we need to know is that God Hates Us All and Kerry King has a plan for us.

Blow it out your ass you pagan fuck. 

I played with a band called Bone Dance once.
They had never heard of Cubone.
Fuck that.
In other news, I will do another Ruined update because I actually have some fresh news on that front. We just got done practicing a few minutes ago and everything is sounding nice and tight for the studio on Tuesday. Thought we are only recording 3 songs and two of them are old songs I still feel like this is finally going to be our first foot in the door of being broke ass musicians. But maybe we'll be broke ass musicians who people maybe give a shit about. Kerry King I hope so. I will say I don't give a shit about most people but I do tip my metaphorical hat to people who support music in whatever way they do. I don't do it nearly enough and I know I am a shitass for it. But anyways, I also got my taxes done so I should be on track for getting a van pretty soon. Once I get one I plan to start booking a tour sometime in May or June. Probably won't be very long unfortunately but I do plan on doing some long ass shit later this year. Otherwise I hope to play a lot more locally and around the midwest when we can. Maybe bop on up to Canada if we can. Keep an eye out for stupid videos we are going to make in the studio. You know the ones I'm talking about, "Yeah I am playing through an XJ-9 Wave Humper with a Jaguar Sex-Tar. Hold on I gotta take a shit dude hit record!" Until then, Stay Gloomy. 

Thursday, February 5, 2015

Liquid Proof, Metaphysical Masquerade, A Gillian Reasons

Take it easy.
I took a 2 hour nap yesterday and then slept for almost 11 hours last night. I don't know if I am getting sick or just needed to catch up on sleep but I am feeling weird today. I am drinking Colombian coffee which I have decided is the shittiest region for coffee. I know that the region that coffee is grown has a big impact on the flavor of coffee but Colombian coffee is consistently shitty tasting to me regardless of the brand or expense. I don't know what it is, I am just a Guatemalan kind of sailor I guess. I wouldn't kick a Costa Rican out of bed neither. But I gave Colombian another shot and it let me down once again. Consider this is my proclamation of acrimony, I'm done with you Colombian coffee. Let's divide our BEANIE BABY COLLECTION and be done with it. I will keep Princess Diana Bear and all my other babies and you get fuck all. 

This really happened.
I know my collection is still
my retirement plan.
What a wonderful world.
I have been playing RPG's again lately. It was good to take a break and play other things like "Sim City" and "Sims 4" but I am back where I truly belong in the realm of spells and gear. I have talked about this before but let me take you into the thoughts I have when I am at work trying to combat the dilapidation of my mind. Let's say hypothetically when you die there is an afterlife, though any sort of conscious life after death is ludicrous but let's make believe and enter the world of fantasy. Take a page out of the Christian dogma and play pretend. What would you do with eternity? Or let me switch things up to be more realistic, you get to design your own Matrix! WOAH!!! That is way more pragmatic and I think we can all wrap our heads around that. So fuck the afterlife you are programming your own Matrix. What would your world be like? Mine would be something like this; it would be a breeding between the realm of old spells and incantations like Diablo, Elder Scrolls, and Lord of the Rings mixed with more modern universes like Final Fantasy, X-Men and Pokemon. Essentially I would like to spend my days in the Matrix slaying demons, mastering spells, wielding a gun-blade and catching Pokemon. I'd like to live in a medieval city that somehow also has high speed internet/indoor plumbing/central air and heat and yet somehow has only recently discovered gunpowder and dragons are a real nuisance. Of course the 4 or 5 people that I like in real life would be welcome in my new Matrix and we can slay together until our biological tethers give out and our life-force evaporates leaving our emaciated corpses for Dozer to clean up. Before that though we'd track down that Cypher dude in his own Matrix and fuck him up real good. Fuck that guy.

Yes, yes a thousand times yes.
In a lot of ways I have been absorbing the 90's once again like many people. I have been watching Friends, X-Files and 90's romantic comedies a lot recently. I know a lot of people look back at the good ole days and bask in the warm glow of everything that once was. And I wonder if in 20 years if people will be really into what's happening nowadays. It seems extremely unlikely to me because it's my belief that any identity or sense of character we once had fell alongside those towers in 2001. The 2000's were nothing, a decade of vapid scared people developing vacant and chagrin films, art and music. And now we are halfway through this decade and nothing seems much different. I know that like any rapid change a cultural revolution could always be waiting around the corner. I am not holding my breath though and for now I am comforted by looking back at what people before my own generation were able to create in a fluid and magnanimous environment like the 90's. Until then I suppose I am just going to shit all over everything and wait in the shadows. Yeah that sounds about right. Stay Gloomy.